The Larbert Ale Fest

March Madness was how Scotrail described their offer which let our group of mostly Glasgow CAMRA members take the 15.18 from Glasgow Queen St to Larbert at half price.  We need more discounts like this in our fair land.  We hoped that somebody in the group knew where the Ale fest was being held.  The Dobbie Hall turned out to be a five minute walk from the station, perfect.

CAMRA members were allowed entry at 16.00, one hour before the general public.  There was a bit of an annoying wait at the door for The Casketeers, we were two minutes early, nobody was there to process us.

Yvonne had her personal snack of Sushi, well somebody has to support this strange industry.  More importantly she had Communal Olives and had also brought along a fresh bottle of Tabasco, a wee kick.

George, The Duke of Hamilton, sat on Hector’s right, Howard was on my left with Robin, and [Stan.TB] was squeezed  in the corner so that he could be a the spill over table behind us too.  Alan and Dr Robin were opposite with Craig and Yvonne. Mr Boyd and Jonathan propped up the end of the table.  We were assembled, time for the off.

The Ales

The first half pint of the day was a guaranteed cracker, Dark Star’s (Partridge Green, West Sussex) American IPA at a surprisingly low abv of 4.7%, ticks all the boxes.  Gold in colour, dry and well hopped, this could easily be regarded as a good session Ale of for the Fest, but that is not the true spirit of attending such days.  So Hector had to give this pleasure up and consult Robin, the Guru, and the others to find which way to go next.  Harveys (Lewes, West Sussex) Sussex Best Bitter at 4.0% was a step down in flavour.  This Amber Ale was dry but did not pack the flavour or punch of its predecessor.  As Robin said, it is rare to see Harveys Beers in Scotland and so it was worth the try.  It also meant that it was time to text Lord Clive of Crawley who was most certainly at work and knows these first two ales well.  It is not enough that we enjoy ourselves; the motto has always been ‘Others must suffer.

How come Robin always gets a larger half pint than everyone else?

Clive took the opportunity of booking a room at Hector’s House for March 2015 when there will be a total eclipse visible in the Faeroe Islands.  There must be a direct ferry from Clydebank to the Faeroes, or maybe there will be by then.  Strangley this is the second time in my life that Solar Eclipses and Larbert have been connected.

By now the cry was we should all be tasting Crouch Vale’s (South Woodham Ferrers, Essex) Amarillo at 5.0%.  Back in the true style of Gold, dry and hoppy this indeed is a fine brew outdone today only by the American IPA, so far.

This was the Larbert Ale Fest so it was certainly time to try the Ale from the local Brewery, Tryst.   At 5.5% the Raj has had its praises sung in the past.  The Ale did not feel as if it had the body of a Beer of this strength, dangerous, but it was only a half pint.  Although pleasant and in our preferred style, it did not compete with what had started the day.

A few years back at an Alloa Ale Fest, the William’s Bros (Alloa, Clackmannanshire) Joker at 5.0% won us all over and became the session Beer of the day.  Hector has not regarded as being that outstanding in sampling since then.  That the keg version that is popping up everywhere is an abomination.  It was worth a try and so I took the plunge.  Sweeter than what we look for these days, but not excessively so, this full bodied Ale won me over once again.  Singing its praises I decided to try their Seven Giraffes at 5.1% which of late has been drier than the Joker.  Today it was declared sweeter, everything is the wrong way around.  By now, Howard and Craig were on board with the Joker and this remained our tipple until the end of the day.   Meanwhile, George, The Duke of Hamilton, was extolling the merits of the American IPA.  At the Glasgow CAMRA table, these were the two Ales of choice at Larbert.

My New Bestest friend

George spent the afternoon scoring the Beer whilst I updated the Bier Database on the trusty HTC.  Good crack.  We were joined by one of the staff whose white beard matched Mr Boyd’s, we had CAMRA stereotypes in abundance.  By 20.00 the table was thinning out, Robin had gone, Alan must have gone with him.  We were joined by two Chaps in matching tops, what’s going on?

The Music

Mein Host that we know from the Alloa Fests came over for his usual chat welcoming us and appreciating the fact that we travel en masse to support their events.  He promised us no music today, so why did a disco start playing by 18.00?  And did the light show really enhance the taste of the Ale?  Again I wonder why we have to endure this nonsense at British Beer Festivals, the music is irrelevant, takes money straight off the profits and annoys the majority of the attendees.  Is it to get women to go along?

The Food

The Pork Pies with Black Pudding, not in the Todmorden style, and Mushy Peas were going down a treat.  Dr Robin had to eat his with two knives; Howard returned baffled to find he had two forks rolled in his napkin.  I am told the food was good, but the queue was always longer than I would wait.  In time the idea of a Larbert Curry was bubbling up in my mind.  The Gulnar Tandoori it would be…

As ever, this was a good event run by the Forth Valley Branch of CAMRA.  It remains a pity that the Glasgow Branch cannot organise anything these days.

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