Bier-Traveller

 Is Hector entitled to Czech Citizenship?

Some were up and out early. As nobody in their right mind would pay for an Ibis Breakfast, people visited various outlets around Andel. Ricky insisted that he and [Stan.TC] go for a Bier. We rendezvoused at Noon and the Tram took us across the River. A local Student advised us where to change for our destination. He was intending studying Physics at St. Andrews, enough already.

Somehow, nine of us alighted from the Tram, [Stan.TC] was left behind. The real Dr Stan would have been on the ball.

Arriving at U Klococnika, many were sitting outside on the Garden Benches. Ricky and I entered first, a choice of Green Label or Red Label, we chose Green, a good choice on this occasion.

As this was a get served at the bar establishment we were first to sit at the large table at the far end of the room. People were smoking, Craig walked in and back out. Yvonne was sent to relay the message, but they managed to find a Bench and we were sorted.

Readers will realise that this Blog is very different from that written two weeks ago whilst in different company – sightseeing? Coffee stops? Just to show that we were taking in the surrounding ambience, I am able to report that U Klococnika is directly opposite the Prague Prison.

The Bier was Kacov, the unpasteurised version, very tasty. This was another of the classic scenarios of the Bier is great, the price unbelievable why leave so soon? Well, we had to wait for [Stan.TC] who arrived on the next Tram.

The Tram Depot was the original plan for the day, however, Mr Holden realised that the Tram we were on was not going to the correct destination, it was crossing town to our must-visit Bier-outlet, U Sadu – Birthplace of Hector.

The Search for Pivo

I went to investigate the Bier the rest secured a shaded table directly outside the door. Asking for Ricky’s Bier recommendation – Uneticka 12 (lezak nefilyrovany) the Bier Pourer looked blank, the two Waiters looked blank.. I was led outside and shown two boards. Our Bier choice was last on the list, we tried again. Patience, perhaps even Service please?

The Uneticka 12 was superb. As my Czech will translate, this was again an unpasteurised Bier, very dry, great after-taste.

The Wrath of Doris

We ordered various non-Curry dishes, Hector went for Chicken Wings again just in case they were as good as yesterday’s – they weren’t. A Doris brought [Stan.TC] the wrong meal, and plonked two Salads down on the table that nobody had ordered. The Tut was unnecessary. Eventually [Stan.TC]’s dish was removed, so were the Salads and given to the adjacent table, no apology to either table. Meanwhile, Howard had nothing. His Ribs did not appear until they were re-ordered. By the time they came we were all able and willing to help Howard complete the destruction of the half pig in from of him.

 Happy Birthday, Hector!

There was a Birthday Card, produced by Jonathan no doubt as few others in the company possess the technical skills. Thank you, Jonathan. There was a Birthday Cake, organised by Yvonne who scooped off some of the Cream before it was officially cut. This was Hector’s first ever taste of Cake, Hector does not eat Cake or add Salt to his Meals. The Cake was moist, creamy, chocolaty, everything sensible people avoid. Thank you, Yvonne.

 The Bier was excellent, the party Atmosphere in full swing, Mr Holden was taking no prisoners as usual. Time to leave. The Staff were not engaging, it was as if we, The Customer, were in the way. Hopefully in the long term, Blog entries such as this will make these people realise what running a Pub/Restaurant is actually about.

Just around the corner lies Kralovstvi, what would this hold? A Pub no Garden or Pavement Seating. If it was not smoke-free, Craig would walk. Doris had one customer, a table on the far side of the room appeared acceptable. Craig mentioned non-smoking and we were uprooted and taken to an Inner Room, it was guaranteed to be smoke free. Cerna Hora 12 was the best Bier on offer, ten were ordered, ten arrived. Doris would pop in every so often to that all was well, another Bier felt appropriate, and so the afternoon developed into one of the Legendary Sessions. Ricky kept us amused with his tales of The World’s Daftest Man.

Fried Bread with Garlic?

Doris was determined that we would buy food, she brought in a Menu and translated the lot into English – aloud. Where was Peter? In the end she brought us a Round of Deep Fried Bread with Garlic, a suitable Snack. We wished now that we could have given her the business, tomorrow we promised her. This was a great Back-street venue run by an enthusiastic Hostess, the difference significant between this and up the road at U Sadu, and the even Sadder Chap at Pivovarksy Dum.

Jonathan, [Stan.TC], and Ricky headed off into Town to another venue before retiring. [Stan.TC] was tired, further proof that he is not the real Stan. Hector led the rest on a venture for Curry-Heute. The Tram did not take us to the door of the Curry House, there was dissent.

The Venues visited today:

U Klococnika – Na Veseli 48, Pancrac, Praha 4

U Sadu – Skroupovo namesti 6, Zizkov, Praha 3

Kralovstvi – Kubelikova 36, Zizkov, Praha 3

Intended Venue (Holden Tours)

Prvni Pivni Tramway,  Na Chodovci 1a  140 00                     (Tram to Sporilov)

 No Sleep until Ceske Budejovice

We were six in a compartment of six, perfect. The train crawled to Dresden then turned up the Elbe Tal towards Bad Schandau. We would pass through Kurort Rathen, the highlight of Hector and Marg’s Summer Vacation two weeks before. The Chaps got to see the Bastei Bridge, being a Romantic at heart, Hector phoned Marg as we passed by.

The arrival in Praha

The Ibis at Mala Strana was not difficult to locate from the Andel Metro Station. Hector was sharing with Robin for two nights, so No Sleep until Ceske Budejovice.

The Metro took us back over to Karlovo Namesti from where we walked down to Vodickova and the Novomestky Pivovar. Neil was waiting in the large room to the right, the Waiter recognised that we must be the Group joining Neil and escorted us through. This was Neil’s third day already.

Robin joined Neil sampling the Dark Pivo, the rest of us went for the excellent Light. I knew I was on a winner here having tried this on the previous visit. The place was non-smoking, and I had Chicken Wings to look forward to.

Now who said: Yvonne wouldn’t have eaten them like that?

The Waiters looked after us well and brought the mass of Chicken Wings and more Bier. Superb, all were happy, fed and watered. Time to move on.

With umbrellas and jackets deployed I showed them the way to Narodni and hence U Medvidku. We were able to secure the only non-reserved table in the non-smoking room. Initially the Waiter felt all were reserved, his Colleagues advised him otherwise. Throughout our stay people came in, saw the reserved signs and left. How much business was lost?

This is possibly the biggest outlet of Budvar in Prague, another treat.

Remember you’re a Womble!

By this time the Overground Advance Party had entered the Czech Republic and had stopped off at Beroun where Pivo was at rural prices, no we were not going out to join them. We climbed the stairs and found the tables all reserved, but from stated times. We were good for a Bier. The Old Gott Micro-brewery is housed in the Attic (no Anne Frank references…). The Bier was impressive, not too dark, still bitter.

Something happened

A South Korean Chap was wandering around with an over-sized Video Camera, this was not for Holiday shots. His mate was the translator into English, he had one of the Brewery Staff translating into Czech. As we were the biggest group in the Attic with newly charged glasses we had to perform for whatever audience he had in mind. Craig was in the corner and so was filmed and interviewed. Why do we like German and Czech Bier so much? ‘Consistency‘ I offered for Craig to repeat, he did.  Ever the Marketing Man.   ‘It’s Cheap!‘ was Yvonne’s submission. Shocking, this is not why we are here, though it helps. At not much more than a £1.00 per pint, The Price  does aid the wallet.

The Brewer passed us on the way out and took a bow, he seemed very pleased with himself, and why not?

Pivovarsky Dum was where we agreed to rendezvous with Jonathan, [Stan.TB] and Ricky, yes the man from Bradford had been picked up en route to the Hull Ferry Crossing. They were already in situ at the agreed time of 20.30, sitting at a table for six. We were ten in all. Mein Host said he had no seats for us. I asked if I could move chairs to create a larger table, not permitted. The Seven of us nearly walked out when he suddenly offered a table for six. Robin and Hector joined the Overlanders, the rest sat in the raised part of the room. So no seats downstairs or in the room to the rear?

Ricky had been in the company of the man formerly known as Dr Stan for some three days, he was concerned. The Glasgow based Friends of Hector were convinced that Dr Stan was kidnapped by Aliens some two years ago. Ricky is convinced that Big Stan has been cloned, he remains unsure as to which version of the numerous versions has accompanied us on this trip.

Meanwhile the saga of a Pub Manager doing his very best to annoy his customers continued.

When a table for four beside us became available I asked if we could move our friends down, not permitted. What was this guy about? Jonathan had tried to secure a large table on arrival, not permitted. Other groups came in, he tried to sit them two with a couple, three with another. They all left. In the end ten of us walked out after one Bier, he let us go. We left with dignity, but Ricky made a point of telling him why we had left.

The Bier was nothing like as good as it was two weeks previously, it was much thinner and less Citrus. I had convinced Robin that it would rival our favourite Tempest Ale, it came nowhere near.

I do not think we shall be going out of our way to spend an evening at Pivovarsky Dum in the near future.

 Wombling On

Somehow I knew that with Ricky in tow, Trams would now feature. Rather than take the Metro back to Andel, Ricky knew the Tram number to cross The Vlatava. Having been to Praha more than twenty times there is an element of trust, but one is always beware of Holden Tours.

Jumping off the Tram a stop or so before Andel, we were marched in Holden-style into a typical Prague Pub, the Jamajka. With many rooms a level below the street this was a popular and very smoky establishment. Craig took one look and bailed, Yvonne went too. It was bedtime for Robin and Mags, Jonathan protested about the smoke then took his seat with [Stan.TC], Neil, Howard, Ricky and Hector.

Unpasteurised Pivo was brought at a price reflecting that this was a locals establishment, it was enjoyable and if it wasn’t Nymburk then someone can advise me as to what it was.

Across the road lay another supplier of Pivo, the Kavarna Jarda Meyer. Again the majority were smokers but we found a table at the open door and basically tried not to block the exit. If only the Chap sitting behind me as thoughtful every time he wanted to go for a P.

The décor was as cheap as I have ever encountered, cardboard boxes adorned the walls. A Big Box stuck out into the room across from us, the piece de resistance?

The Bier was Velen 12, a Wheat Bier, the bananas were not huge. This was my first Czech Weizen, not bad at all. The final Bier of the night was Pater, a classic Czech cold, yellow and fizzy Bier. This was better than average and way better than the too famous Pilsner Urquell.

We called it a halt, tomorrow is a big day, it will be Hector’s Fifth Birthday.

The Micro-breweries and Pubs visited today:

Novomestský pivovar spol. s.r.o., Vodickova 20, 110 00 Praha 1 (Micro)

U Medvidku, Na Perštýne 7, 100 01 Praha 1 (Ground floor Bierhall, upstairs Old Gott Micro)

 Pivovarsky Dum, Jecna/Lipova 15, metro Karlova Namesti (Micro)

Nymburk Jamajka – Staropramenna 23, Smichov, Praha 5.

Kavarna Jarda Mayer – Straropramenna , Smichov, Praha 5

Prague was not on the original plan for this summer’s vacation, especially as its a main feature of the rapidly approaching big tour of 2012: Hector’s Heroic Homecoming. Budapest is the end point of this trip, arriving by boat down the Danube would be a suitable conclusion, unfortunately the timings from Wien and even Bratisalva did not suit, and so a return to Praha for Marg and Hector was a happy compromise.

I arrived in Prague by train for the first time since 1982, either way one still has to negotiate the Metro. The ticket offices are no longer manned at the Main Station, the machines do not accept Notes. Marg went to buy something to break the Paper Money I had leftover from the last visit five years ago, it was declined – the money Notes were out of date. Fortunately the young couple managing the shop were selling Metro Tickets, how very European, one forgets.

We were soon installed in the Hotel Eurostars David, a Four Star hotel which on a room only basis was great value. The room was more than adequate, the bed huge, enough already.

With the mental compass in operation I guided Marg towards the Old Town. Vodickova was the first familiar mains street re-discovered. Food was on Marg’s mind, the smoking ban was on mine. The New Town Brewery became our first pit-stop. We were given a table beside the Copper in this Micro-brewery, this area was non-smoking. I ordered Bier and Chicken Wings, Marg a Coffee and a Salad.

The Light version of the two Biers on offer has not impressed that much on previous visits, today it certainly hit the spot. After a week of Ost-Deutsch rubbish this was a revelation. Had this been with The Chaps, we would have stayed on, the Bier was excellent, the price was right. The Chicken Wings were huge, Spicy, the best ever. This is a must, I shall be back for more very soon. Marg’s Salad was a disaster, it came in installments and was well withered. The staff did not seem that bothered. They did come alive when I purchased the excellent, but green, polo shirt.

Just off Narodni lies Hector’s favourite Prague water-hole – U Vedvidku – this is a Micro-brewery (in the Attic) and an outlet for Budvar. We found a room of six tables, the non-smoking section in the this very large Germanic-style Bierhalle. Marg was being most compliant, she knew that the Bier intake in the past week had declined to an all time holiday low, mineral water was consumed on my my last evening in Deutschland. That the heavens had opened also motivated us to stay put. At just over a £1.00 per pint a great venue.

Finally we arrived at the Karlovy Most, the Charles Bridge. Once more the sky looked angry, a gale was getting up, the artwork was literally flying, the retailers were hurriedly rescuing their wares and packing up for the day. It was a matter of diving for cover.

We reached U Glaubicu just in time. A favourite place of Marg and Hector this is 10m beyond the end of the Bridge and with a large open window a comfortable place to enjoy – a Bier. This time it IMHO the lesser Pilsner Urquell, on sale at under £1.00, ah well given the way they pour it, a short measure but at this price who complains? The Waitresses were a delight, there was a sense of good humour.

I went exploring, the venue felt larger. At the back was a large non-smoking room This will please The Chaps on our visit, in two weeks.

Crossing Charles Bridge once more we heard strains of a Jazz Singer. Below us was a French Market. We went to investigate – it was Food and Drink galore. Marg considered a Crepe, I considered the wonder of the Bass Player with his six string machine, here was a talent.

We retreated to the Hotel before going out for the evening, it would be cooler, more rain looked less likely. It was time for our second ever Prague Curry, and the first to feature in Curry-Heute. I tried to find where we last ate but failed, it has gone. Nearby was the Indian Jewel where we seemed to impress.

There was a Jazz Festival, a stage in the Old Town Square had some acts playing European Jazz, the cool stuff. My Song by Keith Jarrett / Jan Garbarek wafted across the Square between acts, superb. You last heard this at our Wedding, I reminded Marg.

With the streets of Prague now familiar once more I found our way back to Jecna which was a couple of blocks from our Hotel. A Pub that Marg and I enjoyed on our first trip was the penultimate port of call for this first day. We entered U Vocku which we have enjoyed in the past due to it innovative upstairs non-smoking room. The place appeared to be have been done up, maybe it had changed hands to. Two guys blocked our path to the stairwell which was in darkness, both drinking, both smoking. The lower room was empty. I enquired as to the upstairs and was told it was closed. There was no feeling of welcome.  We left with dignity.

Just down the hill a couple of blocks on the same side of Jecna is the Pivovarksy Dum, the now well established Micro Brewery. If one cares for experimental Brews they have a variety of everything but Iron Bru. I asked Doris for a Light Bier, Marg had a small Baileys. As with the New Town Brewery, I have always made a point of trying the Bier here but have never found it outstanding, tonight was different. This was a blast of Hops and Citrus, it could have been, dare I say it – A Long White Cloud served under pressure. I had to text Robin immediately, he now looks forward to sampling this in a couple of weeks.

Day 2 began with an air of familiarity, I knew exactly where we were and so was not too surprised when on leaving the Hotel I found myself at the end of . I recognised the name of the street but could not remember why I was walking along it until I spotted U Fleku. We had to check it out. Only one of the three rooms was open, it was still early, about 11.00. I asked the Chaps if there was a non-smoking room, they were uninterested. At least there is a a fair sized open courtyard if one becomes asphyxiated sitting indoors. The plan was to end the day here, Marg enjoyed her last visit to this famous Tourist Trap.

Walking along Narodni, I let Marg choose her first Coffee Stop of the day. There was an array of places to choose from, this one sold Black Rice Pudding, so Marg’s Breakfast was Dessert, I had my usual Sparkling Water and so did not make a note of the location.

Finding U Medvidku  with ease, it was Hector’s turn to indulge in Curry-Heute at the Royal Bengal around the corner.

Continuing on to the Old Town we were taking the turn towards the Charles Bridge when a voice behind us gave the immortal greeting: ‘ Hello, Mr and Mrs Hector!’

Marg and I know nobody currently in Prague and who would address us so? It was Mein Host from the Indian Jewel. He had read my positive review on his Restaurant and said he would be in touch.

We spotted a shop selling Russian Dolls of Football teams.  I examined the entrails of the Glasgow Rangers Doll to see what the future held.  Alas, these players have gone.   Today the Charles Bridge was its normal calmer self. The Artwork was safe from the elements, business was engaged. We headed up the hill to the Citadel. It is what one does in Prague despite having taken the same photos often-times before. This is now. Parts of St. Vitus Cathedral have been cleaned up, the work continues.

Sightseeing completed we headed up the hill to the area where the Citadel becomes Altstadt and sat down at a Cafe. Why pay three times the going rate for a drink? I suggested we head up to the head of the hill to check that U Cerne Vola (The Black Ox) was still in operation. I had remembered it as opening in the evening, and was surprised to find it already open mid afternoon.

This venue sells Kozel, my second favourite Czech Bier. The ashtrays on every table confirmed the inevitable. We sat opposite the counter and the Pourer of Bier served us, the main Bert was elsewhere. I decided that this was an excellent photo opperchancity, it would be one Bier and off. Given the likelihood of a Smoky Room the next time we are in town, it could be my last visit for a while.

The Pourer of the Bier did not like having his photograph taken. There was a spouting of abuse, but as it was in Czech who knows how well he was wishing we would enjoy the rest of our day.

It was Marg’s turn to satisfy her palate, the Crepe was secured at the French Market, the Band were not up to yesterday’s standard, no Bass Player.

Marg had a notion that we would dine in the Old Town Square at an Italian Restaurant her friend Liz had recommended from a trip a few weeks previously. The food seemed reasonable, they sold only Staropramen. This is the one Bier on the planet that makes Hector suffer the next day, it must be twenty years since I last tried it, never again. We found an alternative round the back of the Astronomical Clock. The Cafe San Nicola served excellent Pasta, we both had the Tagliatelle Carbonara. Hector washed this down with a new Bier – Zatec, which although slightly sweet was decidedly quaffable.

We returned to the Staroprammen outlet for a disappointing Ice-Cream, Chocolate with Hot Raspberries?

Time was passing, the end of the evening was looming. Without the aid of any Navigational Beacons I astonished Marg by taking the back streets and ending up right outside U Medvidku, I do have homing talents. Is this the only place in Prague which sells Budvar at a reasonable price. We sat once more in the relatively small non-smoking room, an adjacent family had ordered a mountain of food. Eat and drink, is this all some people do on holiday?

Finding U Fleku was a piece of cake, I never thought I would write that, it can be awkward, but technology can simplify matters. The plave was emptying, it had just gone 22.00. Marg had had her fill and so I ordered two Biers so that Marg would not lookout of place. This was a good strategy, the glasses here are 0.4l, and it was approaching last orders. Small glasses and twice the price. This place is a rip-off. We were offered the Schnapps from a tray but were wise enough not to accept. The staff have the air of –this is a freeby – the Bill says otherwise.

Overall, one feels that the Customers are doing the Staff a favour by being there, it is an honour for us to be served by them. Then we can sod-off, no longer required. No, this place leaves a lot to be desired.

And so to Budapest…

The Breweries and Pubs visited:

Novomestský pivovar spol. s.r.o., Vodickova 20, 110 00 Praha 1 (Micro)

U Medvidku, Na Perštýne 7, 100 01 Praha 1 (Ground floor Bierhall, upstairs Old Gott Micro)

Pivnice U Glaubicu, Malostranské námestí 266/5, 118 00 Praha 1 – Malá strana

Pivovarsky Dum, Jecna/Lipova 15, metro Karlova Namesti (Micro)

U Cerneho Vola (The Black Ox), Loretanske Namesti 1, Hradcany

U Fleku (At The Clock), Kremencova 11, Nove Mesto

Checked out:

U Vocka, Jecna, 34, Prague 110 00, (Non-smoking room)

U Zlateho Tygra (The Golden Tiger), Husova 11, Stare Mesto